Once every two years I get convinced by an esthetician to “do a little something.'“ They love to call it that. A little something. “A tiny bit of lip filler would look amazing on you”, they say. Or “You’re the perfect candidate for a lip flip!” Sometimes they suggest a “touch of botox” around the crows feet. Or they explain that putting filler in my already full cheeks will “lift the lower face.” They always promise it will look natural. That you won’t even be able to notice. That I’ll just look refreshed.
Well, I regret it. Every. Single. Time.
It blows my mind how normalized altering women’s faces has become. People offer up botox at birthdays like it’s a party favor. Sure, stick that needle filled with a neurotoxin I can’t pronounce into my face. What’s the worst that can happen!
I’m not saying you shouldn’t get injections. There is no right or wrong. I’m just saying that every time I’ve altered my face, even if it’s just a tiny bit of botox, I genuinely hate the way it looks. I hate the way my eyes don’t move when I smile, giving a strained sociopathic look when I’m laughing. I hate the way botox changes my eyebrow shape, and the way my forehead doesn’t move with the rest of my face.
The whole face works as a system, every muscle and bone working together in harmony. And every time I try to tweak a bit of architecture, the whole house falls apart. I never quite look like myself.
Filler has been my greatest offender. Every time I’ve gotten filler, I quickly realize I’ve made a mistake and get it dissolved in a fit of panic. I’ve gotten it under my eyes and in my nasolabial folds, both which ruined the natural contour of my face. My final straw was six months ago when I got lip filler. I watched the man I was seeing scan my face with a furrowed brow. “You had perfect lips,” he said. “why did you mess with them?” I genuinely had no answer. Why did I mess with them? Because someone told me to? I felt like an idiot. And I looked like one too. I got them dissolved that week and swore never to touch my face again.
I’m 31. There are creases around my eyes from a life filled with laughter. There are sunspots on my nose from surfing waves under the sun. My forehead wrinkles when I stick my hands out wide and scream “CAN YOU BELIEVE IT!” I have marks and lines and scars. And I love them. They’re signs of a life well lived.
That being said, I am still a girl. And I still want to be pretty. So here are some holistic ways to enhance your beauty and age gracefully.
Mouth Tape
Nobody wants to be a mouth breather. Taping your mouth while you sleep forces you to breathe through your nose, which not only comes with a myriad of medical benefits but can also improve the shape of your face.
I’m not able to get into the mechanics of nasal breathing and palate posture, but there’s some insane before & after photos of people’s jawlines getting absolutely chiseled after long term use of mouth tape.
I use this mouth tape and these nose strips to open up nasal passageways while I sleep. So if you want to get snatched, shut your damn mouth.
Gua Sha & Face Massage
You’d be shocked at how much of your beauty concerns are due to a blocked lymphatic system or muscle tension in the face. I personally am prone to swelling and puffiness and see such a difference in my natural contour when I perform daily lymphatic drainage. I use this steel gua sha (stainless steel is more hygienic than stone as it’s not porous) and perform this routine on my face every morning before I wash my face. I’m acne prone so I don’t like to leave the oil on, but this face oil has been safe for me!
Muscle tension is another major player when it comes to the shape of your face. We all hold tension in our face, some more than others, and when I do a face massage I am shocked at the difference in how sculpted my face looks. This is my everyday face massage, which targets nasolabial folds and marionette lines that are caused by muscle tension. I also love a deep jaw and buccal face massage done by a professional every few months. If you’ve never tried it, it’s a must! Especially for my fellow jaw clenchers and teeth grinders.
A quick note: Your lymphatic system is pretty shallow and close to the skin, so you want to use light pressure when doing gua sha. For face massage, on the other hand, you want to really get deep and release that tension.
Beef Tallow
A superfood for the skin, beef tallow is a skincare secret for intense hydration and collagen production. It has vitamin A which is a natural retinol and vitamin K that fights free radical damage. It also does wonders for wrinkles & fine lines. There’s a lot of skincare brands that incorporate beef tallow with other ingredients, but I like to use something like this where 100% grass fed beef tallow is the only ingredient.
Face Yoga
We work the muscles in our body, so why not work the muscles in our face? If you’re looking to build cheek volume, tighten the double chin area, or boost circulation—give face yoga a try. There’s lots of videos on YouTube that cater to whatever area you want to work on.
Medical Grade Facials
Treatments like microcurrent, lasers, microneedling, radio frequency, and chemical peels can all offer massive improvement on the overall quality of your skin. The only downside is they’re pricey and typically require multiple treatments. But if you have the budget and the time, go for it!
Lifestyle!
I know you already know this, but what goes into your body directly affects how it looks on the outside. Try to limit the bad stuff (eating out, smoking, alcohol, processed foods) that causes inflammation and premature aging. And try to increase the good stuff (home cooking, high quality whole foods, hydration) that all help in building a radiant, youthful complexion. Oh and don’t forget sunscreen & hydrating skincare. Maybe a retinol too :)
xoxo
Lily
thank you so much for your honest share, really appreciate it! I am doing fascia/face massage by anastasiabeautyfascia and can highly recommend.
I needed this!!! I’ve never had a lymphatic massage, but I know I could really benefit from one. I also clench my jaw and was actually considering Botox to help relax it—I know, I know, lol. I’ll definitely check out your recommendations! ❤️